Category Archives: Black Males
The Pursuit of a Suitable Wife: The Black Man’s Burden (The Aftermath of an MRCi Event)
This an open invitation for you to join us tonight (January 7, 2021) at 7:30 EST / 6:30 CST for what promises to be a vibrant and intellectually stimulating discussion as we kick off our initial 2021 session of Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive.
Click HERE to gain access to the discussion.
During last week’s Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive (MRCi), I learned something about myself. I may have a blind spot in regards to my analysis of the path to a successful relationship. Of course, this revelation was pointed out to me by Black women fighting against Jawanza Kunjufu’s assertion that marriage-minded Black men raised in two-parent households should avoid Black women who were reared in single-parent female-headed households.
Although the men present during the MRCi event agreed with the above assertion and offered personal experience to bolster Kunjufu’s statement, their voices were drowned out by Black women who challenged all reasoning and explanations. Of course, the majority of the women present were products of single female-headed households. This explains why their skepticism rapidly ascended into a rage. Possibly the most powerful rebuttal to Kunjufu was the following quip.
I hate to hear this type of thinking because in the end, no one, not a single one of us, picks their parents. You didn’t pick yours, and I did not select mine.
Although there is much truth found in the above assertion, it does little to combat the reality that many of the men present pushed-back against the idea that there are no differences in the outlook and decision-making of those that Kunjufu termed “daddy-less little girls” and their counterparts raised in healthy and stable two-parent homes.
This matter is a frequent closed-door topic among marriage-minded Black men who believe that a strong family is a prerequisite to a strong Black nation. Untold conversations with marriage-minded Black men reveal that the vast majority have similar evaluation criteria when evaluating a woman’s wife status. What follows is a small portion of the things that many of these Black men seeking a Black woman to marry have shared with me.
- Man, I don’t need that type of headache. If she has never seen her mother interact on the regular with a Black man in a healthy, committed relationship, I won’t even consider her an option.
- Although the physical remains important to me, the type of home and family, she was raised in will cause me to walk away and never look back.
- One of the first questions I ask an attractive sister is, “Tell me about your father.” If he wasn’t around, I am not going to be around. It is too much of a struggle to battle someone whose worldview and image of Black men is unhealthy because they have never seen the presence of a good Black man.
- I’m just not going to hitch my wagon to a Black woman, regardless of how fine and accomplished she is, who does not understand a wife’s role. She has never seen one in her household, so she can’t be one.
It appears that just as many Black women have adapted to the rugged terrain known as the Black dating world, many accomplished Black bachelors have done the same and closed themselves off to a certain segment of Black females. Put simply, they no longer believe that they have the ability to be wife material.
In many ways, the angst expressed by so many Black females during last week’s MRCi session is understandable, yet, there indignation that challenges the rights of marriage-minded Black men to sidestep a segment of Black America is both emotions filled and wrongheaded. Observation and participation are the guideposts leading the decision-making processes of so many Black men at the present moment. The alluded to Black men are merely reacting to terrain that began well before they were conceived.
As with so many other issues afflicting Black men and Black women’s dynamics, there is no definitive answer to this issue. One thing is for certain, somewhere along the way, it became acceptable among a segment of our populace for Black men not to be present to serve as a primary socializing agent in the lives of their children, boys, and girls. This development is serving as a primary determinant in the type of Black woman that marriage-minded Black men pursue. The consequences of this development impact us all. If you do not believe me, ask an accomplished marriage-minded Black man why he is not married with all of these single Black women around.
Black women, before you ask such a question, please brace yourself because what you are about to hear may be uncomfortable, yet, it is nevertheless the truth as he sees it.
This an open invitation for you to join us tonight (January 7, 2021) at 7:30 EST / 6:30 CST for what promises to be a vibrant and intellectually stimulating discussion as we kick off our initial 2021 session of Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive.
Click HERE to gain access to the discussion.
Dr. James Thomas Jones III
© Manhood, Race, and Culture, 2021.
WHAT ARE THE 3 QUALITIES BLACK MEN LOOK FOR WHEN SEARCHING FOR A BLACK WIFE: A MANHOOD RACE CULTURE INTERACTIVE EVENT
I have learned to avoid discussing a few topics in public because of their uncanny ability to cause people to lose their minds. One of the foremost of these taboo topics is Black Love issues, particularly if it calls for any criticism of Black women.
Trust me when I say that if you want to get emotions flowing and possibly a good cuss out, lay any portion of the blame for failed relationships and marriages at the feet of Black women. It is not a stretch of the imagination to say that such an encounter holds the potential to leave your ego bruised, your soul battered, and your sleep pattern disrupted. So, I avoid this topic unless it occurs with Black women that are in my inner-circle.
Yet, I realize that this extremely rough terrain called Black Love must be covered if Black America is ever to come together and create loving families that most agree are the building blocks to strong children and a stronger nation. So, I thought it was somewhat fortuitous when Professor Carl Tone Jones agreed to lead tonight’s Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive session to discuss the three qualities that Black men are looking for in a Black wife.
I, like other members in our robust and dedicated intellectual community, are looking forward to hearing Professor Carl Tone Jones’ presentation as it promises to be an initial step for many Black women to hear and ask questions of Black men regarding what are the qualities that lead them to pursue some women for matrimony eagerly and to avoid others by any means necessary.
This an open invitation for you to join us tonight (January 7, 2021) at 7:30 EST / 6:30 CST for what promises to be a vibrant and intellectually stimulating discussion as we kick off our initial 2021 session of Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive.
Click HERE to gain access to the discussion.
Dr. James Thomas Jones III
WHAT ARE 3 QUALITIES BLACK MEN ARE LOOKING FOR WHEN SEARCHING FOR A BLACK WIFE
MRCi
Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive
Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive is pleased to invite you to its initial event for 2021. This interactive discussion promises to be an exhilarating and enlightening discussion addressing the question of What are three qualities that Black Men are looking for in a Black wife. Tonight’s discussion (Thursday, January 7 @ 7:30 EST / 6:30 CST) will be led by esteemed filmmaker and intellectual Professor Carl Tone Jones. Please click HERE to gain entry.
Once again, the riveting ninety-minute discussion covering What are three qualities that Black Men are looking for in a Black wife is scheduled for Thursday, January 7th @ 7:30 EST / 6:30 CST.
Click this LINK to gain entry.
TO RECEIVE THE VACCINATION OR NOT? THAT IS THE QUESTION FACING BLACK MEN
It is reasonable to state that being a Black man in America is one of the most difficult tasks known to humankind. Black men are the most likely group to be incarcerated while also having the shortest lifespan of all Americans. Although numerous studies have explained why the above is true, what matters most to Black men and those who love them is that this situation exists.
Numerous reminders accentuate the differing experiences and perspectives between Black men and their countrymen. The latest reminder is the global pandemic. Black men seem cursed to receive a heaping dose of misfortune at every turn. This harsh reality creates pessimism in some of the most unusual spaces.
The development of a Covid-19 vaccine is another moment when skepticism rears its ugly head among Black men. Although I am no conspiracy theorist, you know the kind that places their faith in sketchy plots of a secret organization seeking to destroy Black men for no good reason, even I do not consider Black men’s hesitancy to receive the vaccination a sign of paranoia. The historical record offers undeniable proof that Black men should be very concerned about contacting the U.S. medical industry.
An examination of the American health care system reveals many moments of unethical behavior regarding Black men. The most infamous occurrence of medical malpractice is the Tuskegee Study. Consider the information provided by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) regarding what has become known as the Bad Blood experiment.
Tuskegee Study, 1932-1972
Nearly 65 years after the U.S. Public Health Service Syphilis Study at Tuskegee began, President Clinton apologized for the U.S. government’s role in the research study, which was carried out in Macon County, Alabama, from 1932 to 1972.
The United States Public Health Service, in trying to learn more about syphilis and justify treatment programs for blacks, withheld adequate treatment from a group of poor black men who had the disease, causing needless pain and suffering for the men and their loved ones.
The backdrop of medical malpractice serves as the foremost reason many Black men view the arrival of coronavirus vaccines with extreme skepticism. The CDC’s call for all adults to receive the vaccination by the end of 2021 increases those concerns.
The skepticism of Black men will be expressed in a host of ways, such as refusing to be guinea pigs to the medical industry. Others couch their concerns via statements that touch upon systemic racism. For example, a close acquaintance recently shared feelings that the vaccine will be given to Whites first, and if there is anything leftover, then Blacks will receive those scraps. Regardless of the argument Black men associate with, the point remains that they have good reason to proceed with caution. I am certain that health care professionals will be frustrated when their best attempts to “educate” Black men about why they need to be vaccinated causes them to become further entrenched in resistance.
The medical profession is well aware of Black men’s hesitancy to trust new vaccines, hence developing a public relations campaign to convince Black men that the new vaccine is not a return to the unjustifiable medical practices of yesteryear. Medical professionals realize no reassurance for Blacks is to be found in the historical record. There is no persuasive argument capable of convincing the masses of Black men to abandon their varying levels of skepticism. When placed within the proper historical context, the fears of Black men are understandable.
In fact, the alluded to distrust of everything is one of the many adaptations Black men have made as they seek to increase their chances of survival in the land of the free and the home of the brave.
Dr. James Thomas Jones III
© Manhood, Race, and Culture, 2020.