Category Archives: Black Women

African-American Males, African-American Men, African-American Women, Black Girls, Black Males, Black Men, Black Women, RELATIONSHIP

Why Black Men Are Desiring Pickmesha Over Modern Women

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For most, it is a foregone conclusion that there is a civil war occurring between Black males and Black females. It would not be a stretch to state that the alluded conflict has taken on a life of its own. At its core, this conflict reminds one of Michel’le’s inventive creation of the word “Nicety”; meaning behavior that sits somewhere between nice and nasty.

I am sure that you agree that such matters should be the purview of grown Black folks. Unfortunately for Black America, the alluded discord has prematurely entered the lives of middle school-aged Black children. If I did not know any better, I could be convinced that a portion of Black youth’s socialization is intended to prepare them to be foot soldiers in a raging conflict that not a single participant understands how, where, or why it began. The only thing certain is that there are few winners in this game of Black love.

If it can be argued that the “N-word” is the nitroglycerine of the English language, it is more reasonable to consider Black love an allergen to so many of my kind. There is no greater evidence of such than the droves of disenchanted Black folks whose pessimism is displayed via their disengagement with any real hope of finding love with a Black spouse.

Things have gotten so bad on the dating scene within Black America that men and women are eager to teach succeeding generations on how to survive this gladiator sport that often requires participants to destroy potential mates and may lead to one’s mental, spiritual, or even physical death. Often it appears that the goal of Black love is not finding love, rather surviving with dignity and sanity intact.

Admittedly, it is impossible for me to comment on this matter from any perspective other than a Black man, so, I will not attempt to balance my perspective by injecting what I think my female counterparts would say; I certainly do not want to be accused of mansplaining.

I have spent several decades seeking to learn something new every day. Trust me when I tell you that lessons often come from the least likely places and at the most bizarre times. Experience has taught me to accept the blessing of increased knowledge/insight and keep it moving.

This understanding of the unexpected nature of life lessons makes my unexpected engagement with a new term a rather mundane occurrence. While listening to a podcast titled, The Crimson Cure, I learned a new term/identity. During a show that reminds one of the content of Kevin Samuels, I learned about Pickmesha. Apparently, this lady is someone that many Black men love and the majority of Black women hate.

As mentioned previously, I was unfamiliar with who or what a Pickmesha was, however, after listening to the show, it became obvious that she was an African-American woman who is feminine, cooperative, and submissive in regards to her dealings with Black men. Apparently, Pickmesha is a throwback female of yesteryear who has been bred and raised by a long line of feminine, cooperative, and submissive ladies to understand that her foremost priority is serving as a “help meet” for her man. The same role that her mother played for her father and her grandmothers played for her maternal and paternal grandfathers. It appears that Pickmesha knows no other way to be.

To the chagrin of non-Pickmeshas, there is no doubt whatsoever that respectable Black men across the socioeconomic spectrum are selecting Pickmeshas for marriage over them. The reasons undergirding Black men pursuing Pickmeshas for holy matrimony are fairly simple, they like peace and seek lives devoid of the unnecessary conflict and foolishness that so many non-Pickmeshas introduce to every relationship they enter.

One of the most interesting elements of the robust conflict that occurred regarding this matter was the lack of a true understanding of what a Black woman ought to be and ought to do. As a Black man who has talked to many Black women regarding the above matters, I am convinced that there is no single definition that encompasses Black womanhood. Ironically, there appears to be a greater consensus regarding manhood than womanhood within Black America. There is a near consensual agreement within our community that Black men are to be “protectors and providers.” The failure to accomplish these feats makes one a marginal man in the eyes of Black America. However, one has to wonder what are the consensual qualities that Black women must possess to be a woman.

One thing is for sure. If stable, sane, and gainfully employed Black men have any say in the definition of what type of Black woman they desire, Pickmesha will be the woman for them.

James Thomas Jones III, Ph.D.

©Manhood, Race, and Culture, 2021

 

African-American Males, African-American Men, African-American Women, Black Males, Black Men, Black Women, MRCi

Defining What it Means to be a Righteous Black Man?: Does the Absence of such Men Explain the Black Woman’s Refusal to Follow Him

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You are cordially invited to participate in this week’s Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive Zoom discussion about What does a Righteous Black Man looks like. Are they plentiful within Black America? Is the absence of righteous Black men the reason why Black families are in such shambles?

MRCi discussions occur every Thursday @ 7:30 (EST) – 6:30 (CST). Click on the link below to join our intellectual community.

Join us as we discuss pressing matters facing and impacting Black Men and Black America.

Just in case you can not get the link to work, use the information to join the Zoom session.

Meeting ID: 353 334 8869
Passcode: 1YF4BG

African-American Girls, African-American Males, African-American Men, African-American Women, Black Girls, Black Males, Black Men, Black Women, LABOR

No Reported Income?: The Dire Economic Plight of so many Black Millennials and How We Can Address It

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One of the most repetitious yet bemusing moments that repeats itself in my courses occurs after I cover the indispensable contributions of Civil Rights attorney Charles Hamilton Houston’s fight for racial equality. Despite common misconceptions, Houston, not his protégé Thurgood Marshall, matters most mightily in the buildup to the historic Brown v. Board of Education (1954 & 1955) decision. The Supreme Court decision began the process of ending racial segregation in American schools.

The historical record indicates that in the decade following Brown, American institutions (schools, businesses, colleges, etc.) took small steps toward relinquishing many of the vestiges of American-style apartheid. Unfortunately, for the sake of truth, the damage done to Black America’s economic infrastructure as a result of desegregation is rarely discussed. The historical record indicates that Civil Rights leaders shortsightedness relegated Black America to economic subservience.

The consequences of moderate Civil Rights leaders’ decision to exclude Nationalist voices calling for economic self-reliance are impacting us to this moment.

One needs to look no further than the present economic plight of many Blacks for verification of this assertion. The dire economic prospects of a significant portion of Black America demonstrate how important it is for Black America to possess the ability to employ themselves by circulating the dollar amongst themselves. Consider for a moment that recent U.S. Census data indicates that 973,209 millennial Black men have no reported income. I am confident that with the damage that the Black Male brand has undergone over the past decades, many will shake their head at this information and say, “the brothers have got to do better.” Yet this is not a problem exclusive to Black men. The same Census data reports that the plight of millennial Black women is not much better as 707,625 of them are in the same predicament.

The above data would not be as devastating if America were not a Capitalist nation. Even the Wu-Tang Clan told all within earshot that Cash Rules Everything Around Me (C.R.E.A.M). There is no room for a reasonable debate that within Capitalist America, those who possess money wield absolute power over the economically marginalized.

What makes this reality more dangerous for Black men is the relatively standard demand that others expect them to occupy the role of the primary provider in their household. If financial stability is a prerequisite to having a family, the absence of a reliable, substantial income has banished 973,209 millennial Black males to the realm of being inconsequential in Black America’s advancement. Let’s be honest about this matter; the inability of the aforementioned Black men to access capital through “legitimate” means weakens Black America today. It curtails its future potential because Black family’s matter mightily.

When one considers the myriad obstacles, particularly previous entanglement with the American criminal justice system, that stand between Black men and gainful employment, it is time that Black America busies itself developing entrepreneurs and small business owners. The historical record indicates that any reliance on Whites to employ the “hardcore unemployable” in our midst is bound to fail miserably. Turn inward, my people, develop businesses and patronize them as if your life depends on it because it does.

James Thomas Jones III, Ph.D.

©Manhood, Race, and Culture, 2021

African-American Males, African-American Men, African-American Women, Black Males, Black Men, Black Women, RELATIONSHIP

Is the High-Earning Millennial Black Male Invisible to their Female Counterparts?

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A convincing argument could be made that Ralph Ellison’s The Invisible Man is the greatest novel ever written.

I must tell you that Ellison’s unnamed protagonist is “invisible” throughout the entire book for those who have never read this timeless text. Now I do not want you to get the impression that he is see-through as lacking a body; his invisibility results from those around him not being able to see. Everyone he encounters “sees only my surroundings, themselves, or figments of their imagination.”

Ellison’s Invisible Man is no different from millions of Black male millennials living without anyone, especially their Black female counterparts, ever seeing them.

While those on the Right engage in public political propaganda about Critical Race Theory, millennial Black men are facing an unexpected opponent. Young Black men between the ages of 25 – 40 have been rendered invisible. Nearly eighty years after Ellison’s brilliant construct, millennial Black men fit perfectly into it.

If nothing else, the familiar cries of Black women regarding the absence of suitable Black suitors are convincing, particularly to those who have never reviewed relevant data. The “Amen corner” that so eagerly joins into any discussion that culminates with the denigration of Black men has never needed any data to condemn their targets. The evidence base is purely anecdotal evidence provided by a segment of bitter mothers, aunts, sisters, cousins, and friends that serves no purpose other than convincing Black millennial women that there are no suitable marriage-minded Black males. This recycled allegation has reached urban legend status.

The primary problem with the unceasing denigration of millennial Black men is that there is not a shred of evidence supporting the allegations. When one focuses on the plight of educated Black women categorized as millennials, by far the loudest town criers regarding this matter, an interesting portrait arises. If considered seriously, the existing data would mute what has become standard verse for far too many, certainly not all, educated Black women making over $50,000. According to PUMS (2019), when one focuses on higher-income Black millennials, many Black men above the $50,000 income level as their female counterparts. It appears that millennial Black women have inherited a familiar dodge that they cannot find someone who is “equally-yoked” (financially) to build a life with from previous generations of embittered Black women.

When faced with such facts, one can only wonder what excuse millennial Black women who have dominated public conversations will use to explain their difficulty finding an equally-yoked, gainfully employed Black male.

The above information should spotlight what appears to be hopelessly single millennial Black women making over $50,000. If provided the opportunity, I would ask these Black women the following questions.

  • Do you think that your single status is due to Black men deciding that you are not marriage material?
  • Where did you get the idea that there were no equally-yoked marriageable Black men?
  • Have you ever considered that the pessimism that so many millennial women wear as a badge of honor actually an allergen to the gainfully employed equally-yoked Black men that you claim to desire?

Although painful to admit, it appears that yet another generation of Black women has been socialized to be doubting Thomas’ regarding Black suitors. Unfortunately, so many of these women have allowed the experiences of their disenchanted predecessors to be pressed atop their own.

Unfortunately for millennial Black men, it appears that Ralph Ellison’s construct shockingly applies to them. Although frightening to consider, one has to wonder if there is anything that Black men could or should do to break through the glacier-like ice that encases the hearts of so many of their female counterparts?

All of this makes one wonder if the fact that only 25% of Black women will ever marry leads them to abandon the present course that appears to be inspired by the experiences of a group of disenchanted embittered Black women instead of a numerically superior group of Black women who managed to remain married to Black men for decades.

James Thomas Jones III, Ph.D.

©Manhood, Race, and Culture, 2021

#ManhoodRaceCulture  

African-American History, African-American Males, African-American Men, African-American Women, Black Girls, Black Males, Black Men, Black Women, EDUCATION, Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive, MRCi

Alan Bakke — Abigail Fisher: The Issue of Black Intelligence vs. White Intelligence

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Please join MRCi (Manhood, Race, and Culture Interactive) tonight (April 29, 2021) at 7:30 (EST) — 6:30 pm (CST) for an important program dealing with Alan Bakke and the initial attacks on Affirmative Action.

We will examine the idea of Affirmative Action, why was it created and what does it look like at the present moment. Who are Alan Bakke and Abigail Fisher — why are they important to the present predicament and future of Black inclusion?

Can intelligence be measured and is there a difference between Black intelligence and White intelligence? Do you have Black intelligence? Join us tonight to take a Black IQ test.

Please join us as we investigate this pressing matter.

The program begins tonight (Thursday, April 22) at 7:30 (EST) — 6:30 pm (CST). Please click here to join us.

Meeting ID: 353 334 8869
Passcode: 1YF4BG