Tag Archives: Black Cultural Dysfunction

African-American Women, Black Girls, Black Popular Culture, Black Women

Why Do So Many Black Women Like Keke Palmer Refuse To Grow Up?: Yet Another Sign of Black Cultural Dysfunction

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I am sure you’re privy to the recent brouhaha between Keke Palmer and her boyfriend, Darius Jackson. If you are one of the fortunate ones that somehow sidestepped the latest episode of “Black folk sure know how to waste some time,” let me bring you up to speed.

During a trip to Las Vegas, Keke Palmer and her girlfriends attended a performance by R&B superstar Usher. Adorned in a see-through ensemble with a bodysuit beneath, Palmer was called to the stage by Usher. Video footage shows Usher serenading Keke as she twirled around so that everyone in the building could view her hind parts while being cheered on by her entourage. When footage of the adult behavior appeared on Twitter, Mr. Jackson, Palmer’s boyfriend, responded with what most consider a controlling message of toxic manhood via Twitter that read, “It’s the outfit tho…you a mom.”

Of course, those folks that rushed to the defense of any Black woman, regardless of her antics, criticized Darius Jackson while reminding him that he was merely a boyfriend, not a husband. In response to the vociferous criticism from those who encourage the continuing devolution of Black women and Black culture, Mr. Jackson offered the following rebuttal.

We live in a generation where a man of the family doesn’t want the wife & mother to his kids to showcase booty cheeks to please others & he gets told how much of a hater he is. This is my family & my representation. I have standards & morals to what I believe. I rest my case.

I found this young man’s response compelling and reasonable for someone attempting to navigate the myriad obstacles that usually derail Black families. Yet, this essay you are holding in your hands was not caused by the much-too-public spat between Keke and Darius. Raena Boston, a social activist for Black women’s rights, was the catalyst for the words you are reading.

According to Boston, Darius Jackson is not a dutiful boyfriend seeking to build a family with Keke Palmer, the mother of his newborn child. Unbeknownst to Darius and every other sensible Black man, he is “setting the terms of a woman’s existence.” In yet another moment of incoherent psycho-feminist babble, Raena Boston trespasses across adulthood, parental obligations, familial structure, and manhood in one swoop; it is pretty impressive when viewed through such a lens. According to Babbling Boston,

There’s this idea that once a woman becomes partnered with a man, it’s almost like that’s the beginning of the death of herself. And then, once you have kids, it’s game over. You’re just in the service of your husband, in the service of your children. You, as a person, cease to exist in a lot of ways.

In many ways, Boston’s statement reveals the illogical belief that neither adulthood nor the birth of children should alter the lives of Black women. Millions of well-adjusted, sensible, grown Black folks disagree with such foolishness. Boston could not be more wrong in her rhetorical flourish; ask any responsible Black parent, regardless of their gender.

Boston is unaware of the age-old wisdom that once children arrive, your time as a free-wheeling person without an ounce of responsibility ceases. The failure to understand such simple matters that have served as guides for civilized people for centuries is stupefying.

Although this is not a gender issue, one does not need to look far to find dutiful fathers who have worked nearly to death to serve their wives and children. The same goes for women who have sacrificed all in the service of their husband and their children. These sacrifices are what adulthood looks like.

I pray that someone informs Keke of this crucial information before it is too late. I’m sure this message will not arrive from the likes of Raena Boston or the legion of grown boys and girls who are so enamored with the utter foolishness they enjoy to the detriment of their spouses, children, and the larger community.

It is time that Black parents, regardless of gender, get serious about life because a perusal of any census data proves that they are the only one’s out here playing in the high-stakes game of life. While others are building wealth and a legacy for their children, far too many “grown” Black folks remain committed to little more than what the Notorious B.I.G. called “party and bullshit.”

Sit your ass down and instill some semblance of self-esteem in your children so that they will not need to seek it from a public that will view them as pitiful people without purpose or a sense of self.

To all the parents stung by my words, it is time to stand in front of a mirror and tell yourself the following mantra until it is drilled into your foolish head. “Your time is up, you old bastard.”

James Thomas Jones III, Ph.D.

©Manhood, Race, and Culture, 2023

 

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BLACK ECONOMICS

Have We Sunk This Far?: Why Black Folks Have Accused the Black Owners of the Turkey Leg Hut of being Anti-Black

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Most outsiders do not recognize that there is a decades-long war occurring in Black America. Yes, I am alluding to the same conflict that famed comedian Chris Rock termed a Civil War between “Black folk and Niggas.” Experience has taught me that Black folk and N-words have nothing in common.

As you know, every war is composed of a series of battles of varying significance that make up the war. The most recent conflict in Black America’s Civil War occurred at Houston’s hip Third-Ward eatery, The Turkey Leg Hut. It is difficult to explain to outsiders the popularity of this local restaurant to Houstonians. It is THE PLACE TO BE.

The allure of this place causes hundreds of Black folks, even my beautiful cousin Lauren Evans, to stand in line under the legendary oppressive Houston heat for hours every single day. Such popularity has led to a somewhat predictable, yet still unfortunate, issue. The alluded to issue is that there is a segment of Black folks who have adopted an unbelievably dysfunctional culture that renders them an embarrassment to the rest of Black America.

The brouhaha occurring at The Turkey Leg Hut surrounds establishment owners Nakia and Lynn Price’s decision to institute a dress code and code of conduct for patrons. The repeated complaints of the customer base forced the owners of this Black-owned business into publicly detailing what was and was not acceptable within their establishment. According to Nakia Price,

We never governed what people wore before, but now it’s becoming increasingly worse. What we’re seeing is the extreme, like shorts so short that literally your butt is hanging out or shredded shorts with no underwear. When did it become OK to just wear this in public, period, let alone a restaurant? The dress code that we implemented is pretty lax. The only thing that we’re asking is that you have some respect.

Now let’s be clear on precisely what Nakia and Lynn Price are asking of Black folks. The Turkey Leg Hut’s dress code and code of conduct are as follows:

  • No excessively revealing clothing (shorts must cover your entire bottom).
  • No obscene language or baggy clothing.
  • No house attire (including wave caps, du-rags, house shoes or shower caps).
  • No exposed undergarments (including sports bras, bras, panties or garments resembling these items).
  • No swimwear of any kind.

It appears that somewhere along the way, the sense of decency and appropriateness eroded into a sea of nothingness.

Maybe this phenomenon of cultural erosion could be attributed to educated Blacks’ flight to suburban areas during the 70s. Perhaps it was the integration of schools after the Brown v. Board of Education decisions (1954 & 1955). Dare we join the chorus of White racists who fervently believe that there is something intrinsically wrong with Black folks? I dispute the latter notion with my entire being.

I attribute the aforementioned cultural dysfunction of a specific segment of our community to their investment in a dysfunctional culture whose ascension is aided by many things.

  • Lack of knowledge of self.
  • The influence of social media and reality television.
  • Engagement with a popular culture that denigrates Black life in every way imaginable.
  • The absence of socialization that naturally flows from a healthy Black family.
  • A misled cadre of Black clergy who preach a prosperity gospel instead of one based on morality.

One of the surest indicators of how far some within our community strayed from a familiar path of civility are the public outcries that installing a dress code and code of conduct by the owners of The Turkey Leg Hut is anti-Black.

Nothing could be more ludicrous.

It appears that a culture of inappropriateness has become synonymous with Blackness. The adopters of such dysfunction are historically illiterate and culturally backward. The pushback against calls for public decency has undoubtedly caused innumerable graves of our ancestors to be disturbed.

Never in the existence of Black people have we seen such a determination to be uncivilized toward one another. As I have written in this space repeatedly, I am unconcerned with the maneuvers of White racists. My focus is a proactive one that calls for all Blacks to work toward the liberation of Black America.

So, I hope that you comprehend how heartbreaking it is to see my people fight for the right to behave in a manner that guarantees the continuation of their bottom-rung social status.

James Thomas Jones III, Ph.D.

©Manhood, Race, and Culture, 2021